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I Didn't Look Back...but If I Did...by David Spiegel



“I’m numb to judgement — even my own judgement of myself. I know I’m doing the best I can. Judging yourself is a huge vulnerability because everyone else is already doing it for you. And if you’re not in that place, you’ve got no shot. Everybody else sucks at stuff too.”
~ Gary Vaynerchuck, Medium

I'm sure that if I took a look back at my writings from this time of year for the last few years, my messaging to myself would be pretty much the same. 

New Year's day is just one more day on the calendar.
January 1st does not bring new a new beginning to my life.

The idea that this upcoming year will some how magically be better than the last one is silly to me.
Simply put, I wake up each day with the knowledge that I will work hard at being better today than I was yesterday. Just that simple.

Every day is an opportunity to create a better version of me than I was the day before. Therefore, it is only logical that by doing this, this year will see an improved version of David of last year.
The only variable is how much better,and quite frankly, that does not matter.

Better is better.

Whether it's 1% or 10% .

It's still improvement.

If there was a way to measure these things, who knows, maybe 2018 saw a huge shift on the "better" scale. Maybe that percentage of "better" will only be half as much on a daily basis this year than last year. Who cares? Better is still better!

Say my goal was to say become a better free throw shooter. On day one I shot 1 for 10. On day two I shot 2 for 10. That's a 100% improvement. On day three I shot 3 for 10. That's great, even though statistically I didn't improve as much.

You see where this is going. If I got 1 more in every day, at the end of 10 days I would be 10 for 10..
Would that mean I was done, finished, perfect? Or maybe of the 10 for 10, 9 hit the rim first and then fell in. Maybe I could work at each one being a swish....nothing but net. I would still be 10 for 10, yet improving none the less.

Better is better. Period!

My plan for today?
Nothing but net!
Swish!


-- David Spiegel







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Song: Scary Halloween

i went shopping for a pumpkin ran into a Christmas tree instead of seeing orange and black i saw red and green scary Halloween, scary Halloween i got stuck in between Christmas and scary Halloween i went looking for Frankenstein and monsters to fill me with fear but instead i found Santa Claus and his flying reindeer scary Halloween, scary Halloween i got stuck in between Christmas and scary Halloween tried to find my favorites at the grocery store but they're hard to find so tucked away things aren't where they usually live everything is there to give attention to the holiday display scary Halloween, scary Halloween i got stuck in between Christmas and scary Halloween i don't like to complain too much but why are we in such a holiday rush? with so many days between now and then but here we are counting down the days again scary Halloween, scary Halloween i got stuck in between Christmas and scary Halloween -------------------------...

photo: light like saturn 2

(c) 2017 douglas brent smith you may use this image for creative or illustrative purposes, in any way that doesn't harm anyone, if you will please credit it as "light like saturn 1 by douglas brent smith"

poem: patiently

i want to read every book touch every flower, breathe in every mint aired aroma, laugh at all of your jokes      over again see all of your faces trace the years between us and smoothe the bumpy gaps i want to bake a cake so big it takes a lifetime to eat and create a life so long that all the cake is gone i will have it, i will eat it.      i will treat it as your appetizer for better (much better) days to come and what you can't see now in you in me in us in eternity eternally waits,      patiently for your discovery. (c) 2017 douglas brent smith

Awkward Climb

  "Must be January." "Yep." "That's when you work on and think about collages the most." "Correct." "Good times." "Indeed." I look out the window. Snow. Not Chicago level snow, but still snow. Colder than usual. Later than usual. If life is a collage, the picture is still forming. It will be there even when we're not looking. Even when we're not there." Awkward Climb -- collage by Douglas Brent Smith, 1997

More Than One Set Of Books

  More Than One Set Of Books -- collage by douglas brent smith

Heroes Sketched Lightly

  Heroes Sketched Lightly - sketch by douglas brent smith

Invite The Whole Crowd

  Invite The Whole Crowd - collage by Douglas Brent Smith, 1997

intermittant

there were chance meetings distributed miles and months touching us taunting us locking us into a long tight wire of vibrating nuance you knew this, and kept on dancing i knew this, and...what? what  did it mean? how would it turn? oh how we would yearn...oh how we would learn.  

You Can Be Positive

  You Can Be Positive - collage by douglas brent smith.